many times over the years, i have discussed with others how many kindergartners one could fight. i'm not the strongest or most violent person, but i would guess that i could take 20 or so. mind you, gentile reader, that this is mostly hypothetical, and i don't usually want to harm children. but there was an article in this month's esquire that made me rethink the issue. after a brief quiz (physical strength, fighting techniques), it turns out that i am not the child fighting champion that i thought.
14
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Friday, March 21, 2008
Monday, March 17, 2008
happy st. patrick's day!
i'm not really much for holidays, but seeing that st. patrick's day a good excuse to drink all day, i felt it deserved a post. to celebrate, here's a video of shane mcgowan.
-co
-co
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Operation Neti Pot. Prognosis: Eh.
I am currently sick for the third time this season, which I believe is a record for me. Thankfully, I never get really sick (knock on wood) but I do find being sick terribly annoying. I don't have time for this crap!
This particular round of illness is strangely reminiscent of intense allergies, which means lots of sinus shenanigans, so I took this opportunity to invest in a neti pot.
For those of you not familiar, a neti pot is a small ceramic teapot-like contraption designed to help you irrigate your sinus cavities with a saline solution. This is not for the feint of heart. It works by sticking the spout up one nostil, creating a seal, tilting the head, and then letting the saline flood into the sinus cavity and out the other nostril. I've been curious about it for a while, but I've always been too scared. Here are my concerns:
1- I have very sensitive sinuses. My childhood was plagued with ear infections and bloody noses. My adulthood is plagued with tremendous allergies. I've actually started crying on planes because the pain from the sinus pressure is so intense. I tend to avoid swimming, not because I'm self conscious in a swimsuit, but because I can't stand getting water in my nose.
2- What if water gets into my lungs? Isn't water invading your breathing orifices the definition of drowning?
3- My most notable experience with home remedies was when my mom used to pour hot milk down my ear canal when I was little to treat the aforementioned ear infections. It's supposed to loosen things up and flush them out, not unlike a neti pot. I don't feel like I need to explain how excruciatingly painful that is. What if it's like that?
4- What if it doesn't work? I will have tortured myself for nothing.
Well, I put my concerns aside and decided to suck it up and do it. I mixed up the solution (a quarter teaspoon sea salt dissolved in one cup warm water), put my face over the kitchen sink, shoved the thing up my nose, and let 'er rip. At first I thought nothing was happening. Then my face got kinda warm and it sorta smelled like the ocean. Then suddenly water started gushing out of my nose. I was trying to breath through my mouth, but pretty soon the salt water was gushing out of my mouth as well. Now, a person's natural instinct when there's gunk in their nose and throat is to blow it out, but when you've got a waterfall going through there and you start blowing air out the other direction, you shoot water back into the pot, making a gurgling noise like a straw blowing bubbles in a glass of milk. That's when I lost it and started cracking up, spewing mucous and salt water out of my nose, my mouth, and the neti pot intself. I'd gotten through about a third of the liquid that you're supposed to use. I spent some time regaining my composure and continued. Just when I thought I was done I realized I had to do the same thing on the other nostril. The results on the other side were similar.
I wish I could say that after this ordeal I was miraculously cured, but alas, such is not the case. I was still sneezy and my nose was still runny, and I did feel like I had gotten some water up my nose. However, I was breathing a lot easier, the salt seemed to soothe some of the tickly/scratchy feeling I was experiencing, and I slept a LOT better that night than I had previously. I did it once again before I went to work this afternoon and I've felt pretty good all day.
In closing, the neti pot experience isn't as bad as having hot milk poured in your ear, but it's still not particularly pleasant. As for it's effectiveness, I would say that its positive effects outweigh the unpleasant nature of the experience, and thus I will most likely use it again. It was worth the $17 investment.
Next experiment: Operation Sensory Deprivation Tank
This particular round of illness is strangely reminiscent of intense allergies, which means lots of sinus shenanigans, so I took this opportunity to invest in a neti pot.
For those of you not familiar, a neti pot is a small ceramic teapot-like contraption designed to help you irrigate your sinus cavities with a saline solution. This is not for the feint of heart. It works by sticking the spout up one nostil, creating a seal, tilting the head, and then letting the saline flood into the sinus cavity and out the other nostril. I've been curious about it for a while, but I've always been too scared. Here are my concerns:
1- I have very sensitive sinuses. My childhood was plagued with ear infections and bloody noses. My adulthood is plagued with tremendous allergies. I've actually started crying on planes because the pain from the sinus pressure is so intense. I tend to avoid swimming, not because I'm self conscious in a swimsuit, but because I can't stand getting water in my nose.
2- What if water gets into my lungs? Isn't water invading your breathing orifices the definition of drowning?
3- My most notable experience with home remedies was when my mom used to pour hot milk down my ear canal when I was little to treat the aforementioned ear infections. It's supposed to loosen things up and flush them out, not unlike a neti pot. I don't feel like I need to explain how excruciatingly painful that is. What if it's like that?
4- What if it doesn't work? I will have tortured myself for nothing.
Well, I put my concerns aside and decided to suck it up and do it. I mixed up the solution (a quarter teaspoon sea salt dissolved in one cup warm water), put my face over the kitchen sink, shoved the thing up my nose, and let 'er rip. At first I thought nothing was happening. Then my face got kinda warm and it sorta smelled like the ocean. Then suddenly water started gushing out of my nose. I was trying to breath through my mouth, but pretty soon the salt water was gushing out of my mouth as well. Now, a person's natural instinct when there's gunk in their nose and throat is to blow it out, but when you've got a waterfall going through there and you start blowing air out the other direction, you shoot water back into the pot, making a gurgling noise like a straw blowing bubbles in a glass of milk. That's when I lost it and started cracking up, spewing mucous and salt water out of my nose, my mouth, and the neti pot intself. I'd gotten through about a third of the liquid that you're supposed to use. I spent some time regaining my composure and continued. Just when I thought I was done I realized I had to do the same thing on the other nostril. The results on the other side were similar.
I wish I could say that after this ordeal I was miraculously cured, but alas, such is not the case. I was still sneezy and my nose was still runny, and I did feel like I had gotten some water up my nose. However, I was breathing a lot easier, the salt seemed to soothe some of the tickly/scratchy feeling I was experiencing, and I slept a LOT better that night than I had previously. I did it once again before I went to work this afternoon and I've felt pretty good all day.
In closing, the neti pot experience isn't as bad as having hot milk poured in your ear, but it's still not particularly pleasant. As for it's effectiveness, I would say that its positive effects outweigh the unpleasant nature of the experience, and thus I will most likely use it again. It was worth the $17 investment.
Next experiment: Operation Sensory Deprivation Tank
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